Choose Love Over Hate

I’m writing in response to Art Smith’s letter to the editor because I want to be sure that the beautiful, amazing humans who make up our LGBTQIA+ community know that they are loved and valued, that their humanity and right to be who they are will always be affirmed and protected by anyone with a heart and a brain.

First of all, Mr. Smith cited a study published in the non-peer-reviewed journal The New Atlantis by Lawrence S. Mayer and Paul R. McHugh. It’s significant that the journal’s co-publisher is the Ethics and Public Policy Center (EPPC), ‘dedicated to applying the Judeo-Christian moral tradition to critical issues of public policy.’ Seeing that, we can conclude that nothing out of the mouths of these folks is going to be unbiased scientific information. They have an agenda and that agenda is convincing folks that being gay or transgender is inherently bad and unnatural. (Spoiler alert: no it isn’t.)

There’s also a widespread misconception that sex is binary, that all babies inherit either XX or XY chromosomes, that XX means woman and XY means man when that is simply not true. People can have XXY, XYY, X, XXX, or other combinations. Someone with XY chromosomes can develop typically female reproductive systems and vice versa. That can be proven in the lab with science. I wonder how Mr. Smith will go about determining gender in the face of this science. Will he go by chromosomes or will he inspect genitals?

Second, let’s look at the other doctor cited in Mr. Smith’s letter. Quentin Van Meter is indeed a pediatric endocrinologist. He is also a proponent of conversion therapy. Conversion therapy is a coercive and abusive practice that is considered emotionally traumatic. It’s been linked to higher rates of suicide and depression according to the American Psychological Association. Almost every major medical association stands unequivocally opposed to conversion therapy. Therefore, we can conclude that anything out of the mouth of a man who advocates torturing people is bunk.

Third, Mr. Smith tries to convince us that transgender people suffer higher rates of suicide because they are confused. On the contrary, they suffer higher rates of suicide because of the extreme violence and hatred directed toward them. Not surprisingly, when folks are supported and loved by their friends and family, suicide rates go way down. When pronouns are respected and when transgender and non-binary youth can present authentically as their true selves, suicide rates go down. (By the way, gender reassignment surgery is restricted to adults over 18 years of age. I find it telling that the same people who get shrill over the imaginary problem of minors having gender reassignment surgery, have nothing to say when intersex babies are routinely subjected to surgery to assign them a gender without any regard to who they might grow up to be.)

Fourth, there are a lot of things that used to be illegal in the United States that aren’t now, and for good reason. Interracial marriage was illegal up to 1967. It used to be illegal for women and Black people to vote. Heck, it used to be illegal for women in many states to own property. Mr. Smith seems to believe that because homosexuality used to be illegal it means being gay is inherently immoral. By that same token, does Mr. Smith believe that it’s inherently immoral for women to own property or vote?

Fifth, if we must bring the founding fathers into this conversation, let’s see what they had to say about religion.

*George Washington said, “The United States of America should have a foundation free from the influence of clergy.”

*Thomas Jefferson said, “Christianity neither is, nor ever was a part of the common law.”

*John Adams said, “This would be the best of all possible worlds, if there were no religion in it.”

*James Madison said, “The purpose of separation of church and state is to keep forever from these shores the ceaseless strife that has soaked the soil of Europe with blood for centuries.”

(It should be pointed out that the founding fathers held Black people hostage as slaves, forced them to work without pay, separated Black families, cruelly punished them, and sexually assaulted the vulnerable people they stole from Africa. They regularly discounted the humanity of Black and indigenous people. They aren’t exactly role models for morality.)

Sixth, religious conservatives often think oppressively about sex and view what they don’t understand as sexual, hence their vilification of pride parades. It’s important to understand that the kink, leather, and BDSM groups seen at pride aren’t exclusively about sex—they are also about community building. When you are beaten, derided, put down, thrown in jail—all for expressing your real and true self—communities of like-minded people become important. Those groups absolutely deserve to be at pride—they’ve earned their place there through their blood, sweat, tears, and support for the wider LGBTQIA+ community.

During the AIDS crisis, while President Reagan and his administration treated the epidemic like a joke, overwhelmingly it was the kink community that stepped up to support and care for people sick with HIV and AIDS. Jesus, I know, was a big supporter of caring for those less fortunate. It’s really sad that people would rather disparage the pain and sorrow of those who lost loved ones to AIDS instead of finding ways to uplift and support them.

Seventh, not every Christian feels the same way Mr. Smith does about the LGBTQIA+ community. Most Christians live their lives the way Jesus asked them to, with humility and service. Also, not everyone in this country is Christian. There are atheists, Jews, Muslims, Buddhists, pagans, and more. It’s important for every religious person to remember that they have the right to follow their religion the way they want, but—and here’s the important part—they do not have the right to impose their religion on anyone else.

Eighth, equating LGBTQIA+ folks with murderers, liars, and adulterers is simply ridiculous.

Finally, to every person out there who is LGBTQIA+, please know that you are loved. You are valid, you are beautiful, and you are the folks making our community a better place to live because you are authentically, wonderfully you. Be proud of who you are.

Submitted by Jen Ponce

Alliance