“Expect the best, and it will probably happen.”
Suzanne wasn’t talking to me; I just overheard that part of the conversation. (All writers eavesdrop, so watch what you say around me.) But my friend’s words have made a difference in my life.
I was raised by a worrier mother. A lot of what she said involved being careful, and what ifs. My dad was content to let the future happen, since it always does anyway, but he didn’t say much about that, just went about living. Consequently, I wasn’t taught to expect the best. More like, expect the worst so you can be prepared. Really? Whatever the worst is, it will likely not be something we prepared for. Sometimes, we are so busy expecting the worst that we don’t even know what the best might be, and don’t recognize it when it appears.
Some of those blurbs that people pass on via the internet contain real wisdom. This one goes along with Suzanne’s advice. “Fear doesn’t stop death. It stops life.” I wonder how much of my mom’s life got stopped by fear. And who taught her to think in that manner.
Fear comes easily to most of us, and has a purpose. There are many things we should fear if we want to go on living, but it shouldn’t be the loudest voice. Sometimes, maybe most times, our fears are unnecessary. If you are a student of scripture, pay attention to what angels always said when they appeared with news of a miracle. “Be not afraid.” Obviously, they knew/know that news of a big event or change is scary for most of us. If you’re a political person, or a news junkie, turn off the media. What they are selling is fear, and you don’t need to buy. Be not afraid, just spread all the love you can and see what happens.
One way to combat fear is to write about it. Start each sentence with “I’m afraid…” and when you run out of fears to document, look over the list and decide which things you even can control. Which fears are none of your business? How many are even reasonable? An acronym for fear: False Evidence Appearing Real. Likely, when you sort all this out, the list of fears will be a lot shorter. Now, take each worry apart and apply Suzanne’s advice. What might this situation look like if you expected the best? How much of your life might you get back if you lived expecting the best?
One word of caution. All of us have a clear idea of what the best looks like. None of us have the whole picture. What’s really the best may not fit your exact plan. That’s ok. Who remembers the Garth Brooks song about unanswered prayers? Leave some room in your expectations for adjustments. Let the future happen. It always does anyway.
Meet me here next week and meanwhile, expect the best. You’re gonna like it.